Clear Skin, but at what Cost?
I have had moderate to severe acne breakouts since I turned 22, and I’m 35 now. I have picked, sizzled, patted, scrubbed, and cried over the last thirteen years and I finally came out the other end with clear skin. Sometimes I have to admit that the lifestyle I adopted to maintain my clear skin can be exhausting, and though I’m thankful for my clear complexion, I want to be transparent about the fact that it comes at a cost. That sounds dramatic (on brand for me) but I would have liked for someone to explain the good and the bad parts of their skin journey while I was in the throes of my own struggles so that’s the plan here.
It can feel silly to care so much about acne, but it’s also the first thing I see each morning when I get up to wash my face and start the day and I can’t discount the feeling of accomplishment that comes with sorting out my own skin needs. While I have tried various tactics over the last thirteen years, I have really only spent the last 4 years studying skin like it’s my job and doing all these things at once. It has taken me over a year of trial-and-error before reaching a skin equilibrium, and I feel like I’m somewhat on the winning side of a constant battle with bacteria.
The cost to clear skin for me is the toll it has taken on me mentally to be so consistent with things like changing out my bathroom towels, switching up my pillow cases, and generally being so aware of what touches my face. I’ve traded acne for mental energy, and it’s not a small thing to keep up with all the obsessive-adjacent routines I’ve implemented. All considered, I still can’t stress enough how much I hated having acne lesions all over my face at all times for so long and I am just now (after a year of skin recovery) starting to see a decrease in the visible scarring incurred during my acne years. For me, that is worth the self-judgement and lack of spontaneity but I don’t think these tradeoffs would be worth it to every single person who struggles with acne, nor does everyone’s acne stem from the same thing.
I’ve organized my clear skin solutions into two categories: somewhat normal, and things that might make some people uncomfortable because they seem so excessive. Hopefully they help - even if it’s just to have a laugh at the lengths I will go to have clear skin at last.
Things I do that seem somewhat normal:
Use exclusively fragrance-free products on my face. From oil cleanser to facial moisturizer, every step is free of perfume and essential oils.
Double cleanse with a clean-rinsing cleansing oil or cleansing balm and a mild foaming cleanser.
Use a topical rx retinoid on my face every night.
Use a petroleum-based ointment (again, fragrance free) sparingly on my eyelids at night to avoid drying them out with my retinol. I don’t use this on my whole eye socket, just my eyelids.
Use a mid-weight moisturizer on my face (not too greasy, not an oil-free formula that feels more like a gel) before applying my retinol to reduce irritation that can come from a retinoid.
Use a thermal water spray between steps in my skincare routine to lock in moisture with my hydrating spf and moisturizer.
Use a hydrating spf 50 every day, re-applying twice or three times with thin layers depending on how much I exercise or spend time outside.
Limit myself to two or three products on my skin at a time during the day and night so there is less chance of reactivity and my skin has a greater chance to “breathe” through the products I put on my face.
Wear base makeup sparingly, and never exercise with makeup on.
Touch my face as little as possible, and wash my hands often so that when I do scratch any face itches (I have hair that touches me all the time) I am not spreading hand bacteria all over the place.
Things I do that will make some people cringe:
Change out my cotton pillow case each night, washing them with a little bit of bleach each week to eliminate any lingering bacteria.
Use a clean hand towel to dab at the water on my face after a shower instead of using my large shower towel, which only gets washed once or twice weekly.
Use a fragrance-free toner after each shower or face wash to get all traces of hard water off my face. I pour a teaspoon amount into my palm and rub all over my face with both hands.
Stop using all leave-in hair products. Anything that touches my face repeatedly causes a breakout, and once I stopped using leave-in hair products I noticed less breakouts along my jawline where my hair would constantly touch my face.
Cut gluten out of my diet completely, and eat dairy sparingly. These ingredients give me a stomach ache so I have to assume it causes some inflammation throughout my body, which in turn can cause acne. Sugar is likely the culprit for any occasional breakouts I get now, but I can’t quit her just yet. One step at a time, right?
My product favorites:
Cleansing oil: Beauty of Joseon Ginsing Cleansing Oil
Face cleanser: B.LAB Matcha Hydrating Foam Cleanser
Moisturizing Toner: Pyunkang Yul Essence Toner
SPF 50: Avène Solaire UV Mineral Multi-Defense Fluid Sunscreen SPF 50+
Thermal spring water spray: Avène Thermal Spring Water
Petroleum-based eye protectant: CeraVe Healing Ointment
Rx retinoid: 0.1% Tretinoin Cream (ask your doctor!)